I wanted to put up some stop motion animation on youtube and decided to use barbie dolls. So I went to toys R us and bought a whole bunch of barbie dolls in order to make my short clip. The girl at the register was cute and asked me “oh are these for your little sister or daughter?” She said this with a cute smile on her face. I said “no they are for me….” Her smile turned into a look of half disappointment and half fear. Anyway I hope you enjoy this clip, it is from SNL.

The best place to meet woman is in a Male Strip Club. Some might think this is gay…but if you think about it, the ratio of men to women is HUGE. All the females at the club will be focused on the dancers. So don’t flirt with them right away. After the show is over, the girls of course cannot go home with the dancers. So they look around and see YOU. They are like “well I guess he’ll do…” JACKPOT!!!! You will have no competition because no guys will be willing to go to a Male Strip Club unless they are gay. There is a good chance you will be the only straight guy at the Club. If your really shy about going alone, go with a bunch of your girlfriends. Anytime I go to Vegas my girlfriends always want to go see Chip and Dales, all the guys with us are not down for that at all, but I am…..

I go the the gym once in a while but I do not flirt with woman anymore. I don’t think woman go to meet guys, but the gym is a perfect place to meet men. The guys are working out to look better…..FOR WOMAN. This shows that they are not lazy and they know how to take care of themselves. I tried to flirt with a girl once but she was not having it. She put her headphones back on and told me to get out of the way. So I stopped…but one time I only had about 30 minutes to finish my workout and was waiting for a cycle machine. I waited behind a woman who was attractive. But all I cared about with finishing my workout but this woman was taking FOREVER. After she was finally done the machine was covered it sweat. I told her she didn’t have to wipe it down because I was in a hurry…….then she gave me a dirty look like I was some kind of pervert and wiped the machine and walked away. Did I do something wrong? I don’t think so….

I remember when pinkberry yogurt came about and a co-worker brought a whole bunch of it to work to share with everyone. I never heard of this stuff and when I first saw it, I thought it was ice cream. Looked exactly like McDonald’s Soft Serve Ice Cream….I love that stuff. So I picked it up and scooped a big chunk in my mouth. I spit it back out and said “Nobody eat the ice cream!!!, the ice cream has gone bad!!!” For me it tastes too sour…but everyone seems to love it. I will stick with ice cream. The next time you go to McDonalds get the Soft Serve Ice Cream and a side of french fries. You a fry and dip it in the ice cream….so gooood. Ice Cream give me diarrhoea, but it is sooo worth it.

Everytime a woman goes to the bathroom, she has to use a toilet seat cover. Those toilet seat covers are very thin and sometimes they are all out. Why not have a plastic toilet seat cover you can carry inside your purse!! When you have to use the toilet you take your PLASTIC toilet seat cover (which will be folded and inside another plastic case) and lay it down. Do your business and put your plastic toilet seat cover back into its case. You can think of it has a kind of handkerchief. I am a man but I think this is a great idea. Plastic is also easy to wash! You can get it in different colors and designs. Price range ($2.99 to $29.99 depending on the designer). This will be the next big thing. What do you guys think??

I am going to tell you some secrets on what to do on a first date. Here is my first advice. When your on the date you will probably go to a shopping area, just to look around. Keep your ears open and see if she is interested in anything. For example, you see her pick up a perfume and tries it on and she likes it. Remember which one she liked. After you go somewhere else, tell her you have to go to the bathroom. Run to the store and buy it. Now this is the hard part. All woman have purses. They love their purse and never let it out of their site. You have to somehow put the perfume into her purse. I suggest in the movie theater where it is very dark. After the date is over. She will go home and maybe that night or the next day she will find that wonderful surprise. She will HAVE to give you a call. That gift got you, a second call, showed your not cheap, showed your romantic, and most likely got you a second date. You know she will tell her girlfriends and her girlfriends will LOVE you which is another plus. Doing this will not make you look creepy, it works! Woman love this kind of stuff.

Well the year is over and Mike Birbiglia wins the wozog for Funniest Stand-up Comedian. He beat out the likes of Dane Cook and Nick Swardson. Mike Birbiglia does a blog as well and it is called My Secret Public Journal. Here is a clip of some of his style of comedy, tell me if you guys agree with me.

This problem does not apply to people who do not change in the bathroom. Some people take a shower and wear a towel and walk to his or her room, then change. However people like me take their new clothes into the bathroom and after they shower they change inside the bathroom. The reason I do this personally is that my house gets too cold in the morning and I don’t want to walk ten yards to my room wearing only my towel. So I change in the bathroom which is warm because of the steam that is left over. However, this causes a double underwear problem. DUP is when you take a shower and come out to see two underwear on the floor. One is the new one and the other is the old one. Maybe girls don’t have this problem because they wear underwear with different designs, but for guys most of their underwear and boxers look the same. I know what your thinking why not just FEEL the two underwear to see which one FEELS newer. But there is a problem with this tactic because the steam has made the two underwear feel the same. I don’t like doing laundry so putting BOTH in the laundry basket is out of the question. So the only thing to do is…..smell….works every time.

Something very disgusting happens to me when I take a dump. First of all, I pee when I go poop. So when the first piece of crap comes down, it hits the pee water and pee water splashes on to my ass. Almost impossible to stop… I know 90% of you reading this, knows what I mean. I always wonder WHY this happens…A few years ago I found out why. You have to think of your crap as a high board diver. When the diver hits the water at a straight angle, there is less splash which results in a high score. However if he is not straight then he hits the water at a wrong angle which creates a lot of splash, resulting in a horrible score. Therefore the only explanation of this is that our asshole is not even with the toilet water. So this means you have to lean back when you take a crap..I no longer have that problem…For all of you who have this problem….your welcome.